Chapter 1
When it comes to popularity, it doesn't rule in my favor. My voice is of a silent whisper among all things, and yet the little I do seems to influence many people. I'm a shy person at heart , believe it or not I don't want to be, it's just as if I'm awaiting for life to approach me vs. stepping up to life and challenging it. I live with regret and remorse that weigh heavily upon me with every step I take. I just wish I could take it all back, relive the aspects of my life that didn't go as well as I hoped.
What always seems to be clouding my mind is girls. I'm always thinking about them much more than I should be. It bizarre and I don't know why, after so many let downs I keep pursing them. My time will come that Ill find the right one, but for now I'm just keeping my eyes wide open.
Chapter 2
I remember freshman year as if it was yesterday, I was always trying to pursue these girls and win their heart. One in particular named Alli, man was she beautiful. She was in my biology class, and she always sat next to me. Every time I'd talk to her my heart would be beating a mile a minute, I was nervous none the less, I try ed not to show it, but with girls they usually can tell when a guy is nervous. I had convinced myself after about 4 months of talking to her that, it could be possible that she would want to go on a date with me. The only problem was my nerves latched on to me and I became to nervous to ask the question. So I began to think of a way to ask her out in away that my nerves wouldn't make chicken out.
My friend Jason, who I am very close to gave me the most brilliant idea, since I didn't have the courage to say it to Alli why not just write my feelings down upon a piece of paper and give it to her. So I decided to do so and this is what i wrote:
Dear Alli,
The past few months that we have know each other, has been some of the most memorable times of my life. Our friendship is pure, and quiet frankly i never imagined we'd make it this far. Furthermore, your friendship has shaped me into a better person than I already was. So lets take it to the next step, give me a chance to change your life, an opportunity to show you my true feelings for you.
Regards,
Xavier
I handed it to her the next day, and she seemed puzzled but I just told her to read it when she got home. She said okay and I was relieved to finally get my true feelings to her. I thought everything would be perfect and she would go on a date with me, but I was mistaken.
Chapter 3
The next few days where quiet with me and Alli, she didn't speak much as she use to prior to being given the letter. I began to worry that I moved to fast in the relationship, that she might hate me and never talk to me ever again. I finally asked her one day about the letter, and what she said was that she had burnt the letter and to leave her alone. The moment she said she burnt it, my heart shattered into pieces. Everything that defined me for who I was seemed to diminish into thin air, and I was convinced their be no other girl in my life.
I told Jason what had happened and he said to me " Dude, what she said to you was cruel and harsh, anybody making your moral drop isn't some one that you should be hanging around with. You'll find another girl I know you will, it may not be in high school but most definitely in the future."
" I don't know man, she meant the world to me she made me feel right, she gave me purpose and truth, and showed me the way."
" You have to move on Xavier because if you don't your self esteem will eat you alive. Plus dude where in a high school, with thousands of girls, the likely hood that you don't find one that's true to you is low."
"Are you sure about that Jason?"
" Yes I'm sure, I'll help you find the right one I promise, I gotcha back."
" Yeah it is man, and Jason just because she really good looking doesn't mean she wouldn't like me."
" That's what you always say about any hot girl you see."
" She diff rent man, I can feel it in my heart."
" Then if she you're supposed Juliet why don't you go talk to her?"
" You're crazy man, I can't just get up and start having a conversation with her."
" Sure ya can come on Ill bring you over."
Jason got up and pulled my arm and forced me to get up. I said to him " What are you doing man you're crazy, let me go!" But he dragged me over to her and said "This is my friend Xavier, and he wanted to talk to you."
She looked at me and smiled, which only made me more nervous to say anything, and all I was able to say was " Hi"
She said " Hi"
" So how are you?" I asked her I was holding my breath each second because I was very nervous.
" I'm fine how about your self?"
" I'm good"
Then my nerves attacked me like a meteor falling from a sky and I said " What's up?"
I practically had a nervous break down in front of her, which would have been very em brassing. I had just asked the same kind of question twice or so I thought. She had paused for a moment which made me even more nervous and she finally after it seemed like a year for her to responded" Nothing much. you? "
" Same, well it was nice talking to you take care."
I left before she could respond because my nerves where making it impossible to talk to her at the same time. If you want to know the truth, I really did want to stay there and talk so more I just couldn't. I ran away like a mad man.
I went back to sit with Jason after She had left the room. He asked me " So how did it go man, she you're Juliet?"
I told him the conversation and he said " The only reason she paused was she had to think of her answer it wasn't anything against you dude."
" I wish I could have said more though."
" Dude it's a fresh new start for you, a window of possibilities has just opened up for you, it up for you to decide what you do with your life."
I couldn't get it off my mind what Jason had just told me. I kept thinking, maybe he is right my life does lay ahead of me and its up for me to decide where it goes from here. I then began to think maybe she will really like me as much as I do for her. But I kept in mind that it was probably only a dream though and that I'd remain anonymous the rest of my life.
A few weeks had passed and I hadn't spoken to her at all, I really wanted to but it was just to hard. Instead I would be telling Jason all about my feelings for her.
" She is so beautiful man."
" I know that, you're always telling me that I don't see whats so hard for you to go up to her and strike up a conversation."
" She to beautiful man to talk to and all I don't want to say something that's gonna me look like a fool."
" Dude nobody is perfect, maybe you might stumble across a few words here and there, but what girls are looking for in a guy is who he is as a person."
" I'm not sure, if you're......
All of a sudden she walks by me and Jason, and she goes to go get a snack from the vending machine behind us.
" She's looking pretty today, man is she something."
" Go talk to her she all alone this is your perfect opportunity for you."
" Nah man I can't."
Just then she bent down and grabbed her snack outta the machine, and my eyes sorta wandered to her butt, of course I didn't mean to it just sorta of happened. Then to my luck she noticed that I was looking at her butt in the mirror of the vending machine and came over to talk me and Jason.
" What where you two looking at?"
" I was looking at the snacks in the vending machine to see what kind they had causes I was just about to go over there when you came." said Jason
" Mhmm sure you where how about you what where you looking at?"
I went it to a panic I looked at her and then Jason and then her again finally said " I wasn't looking at anything I just happened to glance your way, right Jason?"
" Yeah totally."
" Mhmm sure you where."
Then she decided to sit at the table we where at and she sat right next to me and she started talking to me.
" So how have you been?"
" I been well how about you?"
" Really good, there been this really cute guy that's been looking at me a lot recently."
My curiosity to find out who this cute guy was, drove me to keep talking to her, it almost as if my curiosity exceeded my nerves for the first time.
" Whats his name?"
" Well he has these really light blue eyes that are as blue the sky, his smile is as warm as the sun setting across the horizon. He has black hair that is as smooth as silk, and dark as night."
I began to repeat what she said over and over in my head and I began to think maybe it was me that she was talking about, but then I thought that's only a fairy tale in my mind.
" Does he have a name?"
" Yes it is Xavier Princeton."
" Uh but that's me you're talking about right?" Is all I could say boy what a come back.
" Yes it is."
When she said yes a fireworks went off in my heart and I was filled with happiness and joy.But I was wondering why would she say this if we've only spoken once. I asked her that and she said " You're friend Jason has been telling me all about the sweet things you've been saying about me, and you're kind hearted Xavier you just got to open up more, be your self infront of a girl not somebody whose shy, because you're a really good guy deep down inside."
I never thought I would ever hear a girl say that to me, it suprised me at first and I found that I couldn't believe it was actually possible at points. All I knew was it was a fresh new start to a new beginng, a new chapter lays ahead of me. Now the only question is what's next.......?
I told Jason what had happened and he said to me " Dude, what she said to you was cruel and harsh, anybody making your moral drop isn't some one that you should be hanging around with. You'll find another girl I know you will, it may not be in high school but most definitely in the future."
" I don't know man, she meant the world to me she made me feel right, she gave me purpose and truth, and showed me the way."
" You have to move on Xavier because if you don't your self esteem will eat you alive. Plus dude where in a high school, with thousands of girls, the likely hood that you don't find one that's true to you is low."
"Are you sure about that Jason?"
" Yes I'm sure, I'll help you find the right one I promise, I gotcha back."
Chapter 4
When I first meet Jason we hit it off really well. We always talked about the girls we admired, and about how beautiful each one of them was. Jason would always point out these hot girls,in the cafeteria and he ask me if I'd date them, and I say ya man. I almost knew what this would lead to, then we started a betting pool, where we would bet on each other having a conversation with the hot girls that we pointed out to each other. Pretty soon it became unfair because he knew I barely had the courage to talk to any of them so he started picking extremely beautiful girls. Jason won the bet of course, and I moved on like nothing ever happened.
Chapter 5
One day me and Jason where hanging around in homeroom, bored outta of our minds. Jason started raving on and on about this girl he admired, when outta no where the most beautiful girl walked into our homeroom she had dark brown eyes, and a warming smile that confronted me. She was different from any other girls who I admired, there was just something about her that was unquine, she wasn't just one of those girls who'd give you the time and day like many previous girls I admired, she made me feel that I had a place where I belonged. Jason said me" Oh no man not one of your fairy tale love stories again is it?" " Yeah it is man, and Jason just because she really good looking doesn't mean she wouldn't like me."
" That's what you always say about any hot girl you see."
" She diff rent man, I can feel it in my heart."
" Then if she you're supposed Juliet why don't you go talk to her?"
" You're crazy man, I can't just get up and start having a conversation with her."
" Sure ya can come on Ill bring you over."
Jason got up and pulled my arm and forced me to get up. I said to him " What are you doing man you're crazy, let me go!" But he dragged me over to her and said "This is my friend Xavier, and he wanted to talk to you."
She looked at me and smiled, which only made me more nervous to say anything, and all I was able to say was " Hi"
She said " Hi"
" So how are you?" I asked her I was holding my breath each second because I was very nervous.
" I'm fine how about your self?"
" I'm good"
Then my nerves attacked me like a meteor falling from a sky and I said " What's up?"
I practically had a nervous break down in front of her, which would have been very em brassing. I had just asked the same kind of question twice or so I thought. She had paused for a moment which made me even more nervous and she finally after it seemed like a year for her to responded" Nothing much. you? "
" Same, well it was nice talking to you take care."
I left before she could respond because my nerves where making it impossible to talk to her at the same time. If you want to know the truth, I really did want to stay there and talk so more I just couldn't. I ran away like a mad man.
I went back to sit with Jason after She had left the room. He asked me " So how did it go man, she you're Juliet?"
I told him the conversation and he said " The only reason she paused was she had to think of her answer it wasn't anything against you dude."
" I wish I could have said more though."
" Dude it's a fresh new start for you, a window of possibilities has just opened up for you, it up for you to decide what you do with your life."
Chapter 6
I couldn't get it off my mind what Jason had just told me. I kept thinking, maybe he is right my life does lay ahead of me and its up for me to decide where it goes from here. I then began to think maybe she will really like me as much as I do for her. But I kept in mind that it was probably only a dream though and that I'd remain anonymous the rest of my life.
A few weeks had passed and I hadn't spoken to her at all, I really wanted to but it was just to hard. Instead I would be telling Jason all about my feelings for her.
" She is so beautiful man."
" I know that, you're always telling me that I don't see whats so hard for you to go up to her and strike up a conversation."
" She to beautiful man to talk to and all I don't want to say something that's gonna me look like a fool."
" Dude nobody is perfect, maybe you might stumble across a few words here and there, but what girls are looking for in a guy is who he is as a person."
" I'm not sure, if you're......
All of a sudden she walks by me and Jason, and she goes to go get a snack from the vending machine behind us.
" She's looking pretty today, man is she something."
" Go talk to her she all alone this is your perfect opportunity for you."
" Nah man I can't."
Just then she bent down and grabbed her snack outta the machine, and my eyes sorta wandered to her butt, of course I didn't mean to it just sorta of happened. Then to my luck she noticed that I was looking at her butt in the mirror of the vending machine and came over to talk me and Jason.
" What where you two looking at?"
" I was looking at the snacks in the vending machine to see what kind they had causes I was just about to go over there when you came." said Jason
" Mhmm sure you where how about you what where you looking at?"
I went it to a panic I looked at her and then Jason and then her again finally said " I wasn't looking at anything I just happened to glance your way, right Jason?"
" Yeah totally."
" Mhmm sure you where."
Then she decided to sit at the table we where at and she sat right next to me and she started talking to me.
" So how have you been?"
" I been well how about you?"
" Really good, there been this really cute guy that's been looking at me a lot recently."
My curiosity to find out who this cute guy was, drove me to keep talking to her, it almost as if my curiosity exceeded my nerves for the first time.
" Whats his name?"
" Well he has these really light blue eyes that are as blue the sky, his smile is as warm as the sun setting across the horizon. He has black hair that is as smooth as silk, and dark as night."
I began to repeat what she said over and over in my head and I began to think maybe it was me that she was talking about, but then I thought that's only a fairy tale in my mind.
" Does he have a name?"
" Yes it is Xavier Princeton."
Chapter 7
The moment she had said my name my heart skipped a beat and exploded with emotion. I began to think if what she said was true and she wasn't true my search had finally ended." Uh but that's me you're talking about right?" Is all I could say boy what a come back.
" Yes it is."
When she said yes a fireworks went off in my heart and I was filled with happiness and joy.But I was wondering why would she say this if we've only spoken once. I asked her that and she said " You're friend Jason has been telling me all about the sweet things you've been saying about me, and you're kind hearted Xavier you just got to open up more, be your self infront of a girl not somebody whose shy, because you're a really good guy deep down inside."
I never thought I would ever hear a girl say that to me, it suprised me at first and I found that I couldn't believe it was actually possible at points. All I knew was it was a fresh new start to a new beginng, a new chapter lays ahead of me. Now the only question is what's next.......?
